There have been many times I’ve tried to help a friend with a problem – some practical ones, others relational. It hasn’t always gone well. It’s usually because that person had not asked for my help and maybe didn’t even want the situation to be changed yet. The other person has to want to be helped – or there is no use. It might be more like pouring more fuel on a fire instead of water. But I have learned that an attitude of gentleness usually works better than a challenging, questioning posture.